This letter is addressed to none other than you yourself
Read it don't just cast it aside in bin, drawer or on shelf
this is an important document straight from a collection agency
we have called emailed hell we even texted with much frequency
but you have chosen to use third party methods to respond to us
used middle men strange tactics and sent smoke signals. what a fuss!
this note is nothing more than an attempt to collect an over due debt
no payment plan is available only a full payment can serve to offset
the amount you have accumulated as past and overdue charges
if your payment history was a career it would be El Debarge's
It had some consistency early on but very quickly went away
in other words you seemed to be willing but now you don't wanna pay
we have tried too many times to offer payment situations that could fit
your budget your needs your situation we really used all our wit
All of that is in the past now we cant afford to leave this one unresolved
a promise we make to you that once payment is received all will be absolved
we just want what is due to our agency nothing more nothing less
if we acquire these assets we assure you no further stress
Now if you have forgotten we have no trouble reminding you of the debit you owe
realize that it started off small but time is a hill and debt a ball of snow
so as time went on what you owe has had time to grow and multiply exponentially
we must accept some of the blame we thought you would get to it eventually
before you freak,no worries what you owe will not get you convicted of any crime
But this letter is your last chance to respond to your debt of MAJOR FACE TIME
This has been the collection agency and we sincerely sign off now
hopefully our next conversation will be when we are standing brow to brow
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