Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Tuesday's Taboo: The Pseudo Relationship and Cheating

Talking, Dating, Kickin It, Goin Together, and Cheating

Ok first let me apologize Tuesday got away from me I was ridiculously busy all day, so I am addressing Tuesdays Taboo on Wednesday yeah I know once again I apologize.

I am not sure at what point in urban history this phrase "Talking" was introduced. I only want to know the exact date so I can mark it as the end of conventional sense, and the beginning of collective coonery. I having been raised under an English language tyrant never had the opportunity to stay current on urban vernacular. Hell I am convinced I still don't know what this phrase means beyond actually speaking, something that has caused me problems with people who have forgotten that the word had a meaning before it was lent to it's urban meaning. I guess my biggest issue with it, is that like most urban terms it is ambiguous and subjective. There are no defined parameters, or set protocols when one is "talkin" to someone. From what I gather it simply means that you are spending time with a person and having regular phone based conversations with them. It appears that at some point phone communication with a person of the opposite was deemed a sign of something going on. However it would appear that none of these situations are exclusive, but if someone violates the "sanctity" of them it is a problem. It seems like noone ever wants to talk about how silly this all is. Noone wants to be tied down in a relationship anymore but we want an exclusive pseudo-relationship situation. It makes no sense at all. I am old school, dating is a scene. You can "date" several people because dating just means going on dates. After dating a person for a while then you make a commitment to exclusivity. At which point you are in a committed relationship. Noone says these things anymore, they are too defined. We would rather hide behind an "It's Complicated" relationship status. If there is no real commitment to exclusivity there is no such thing as cheating. My mother says that if you are not married there is no such thing as cheating. I won't go that far but it's ridiculous what constitutes cheating nowadays. Trust is the issue, and until people make the decision to put effort into trusting we will continue to have baboon relationships where we flip out and go nuts if someone is breathing near our partner.....

p.s. Trust is not built when things seems right. when things are strange, or unpleasent, uncertain, or difficult, that is when trust is truly built.

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